Grieving for My Son That Was Destined to Live

This is a difficult story to share. I am sharing it in hopes no one else experiences this. I do not want to bring attention to myself but in the hopes that it will help someone avoid this similar situation. Also, to inspire someone else who goes through a difficult time with their child. This event has shaped the course of our lives to this point. This is where the Fab Warrior Mom that I am came to know to be an advocate for my son.

 I was ten weeks along and I went in for a check up. Sadly, the dr. did not hear a heartbeat. We were told our baby had passed. Because of the kind of miscarriage my dr. perceived that I had, I would have to have a D&C procedure immediately. I had the surgery and rested at home for 2 weeks. During this time, the boss and I grieved for the loss of our first child. We received outpouring support from our loved ones. I bought a memory box to keep sentimental cards, my hospital bracelet, my first Mother's Day card from my husband and a teddy bear. I planned to keep the box in our room as a memory of our child. I would stand by it crying, praying it wasn't true.

Two weeks passed and I went in for a post check up. I told the dr. I had no cramping nor discharge. I was concerned why did these things not happen. The dr. sent us for another sonogram. The news we received after were both frightening and amazing at the same time. I had not miscarried and despite the D & C I was still pregnant. The doctors explained that I had a fibroid ( I was aware of) which protected the baby when the surgery was performed. I believe it was God who protected our son. We were very concerned how our baby was doing. The months following were an emotional roller coaster waiting to see if our son was healthy.

Ever since this occurred I knew my boy was strong and a fighter. He will do amazing things in God's kingdom.

For years I could not tell this story without crying, now I share it with you to inspire and show God has a plan for each of us.